Archive for July, 2009

“There’s nothing in modern books these days…”

Posted in Uncategorized on July 23, 2009 by Bex

“…all story telling only.”

Cannot agree more with this article. As all of you know, I am really into ancient Christian authors and ancient Christian books. Maybe it’s because there is real passion in their books, whereas these days all we get is dry formula and no heart at all. Maybe it’s because there is real revelation and teaching in those books, while modern ones are sometimes so relational, so focused on building up the self, that there is hardly any mention of Christ. Even if you take away all these factors, they’re worth reading for the LANGUAGE alone.

And while my mum thinks I’m ridiculous for reading such old books, and dad sometimes has his reservations, “You’re reading OS GUINNESS? ISN’T THAT BOOK 30 YEARS OLD?” he at least understands why I love them and just bought me a 100-year-old one yesterday! And then announced that there is nothing in modern books these days.

Oh well, what can we do? People no longer like reading, most pastors don’t even read their Bibles anymore, what else can you expect of “normal” Christians?

These sounds from the past reminded me of some other distant voices I have been listening to recently. They are the voices of dead Christians—writers of classic books and songs that we are close to forgetting today.

Their names are probably somewhat familiar to you. Jonathan Edwards. John Wesley. Charles Finney. Catherine Booth. Andrew Murray. Evans Roberts. Charles Spurgeon. Fanny Crosby. E.M. Bounds. Watchman Nee. A.W. Tozer. William Seymour. A.B. Simpson. Corrie Ten Boom. Leonard Ravenhill. Fuchsia Pickett.

All of them could be labeled revivalists. All challenged the Christians of their generation to embrace repentance and humility. They understood a realm of spiritual maturity and a depth of character that few of us today even aspire to obtain.

When I read their words I feel much the same way I did after hearing my grandparents’ voices on that old tape. I feel as if I am tapping into a realm of spirituality that is on the verge of extinction.

What was the secret of these great Christians who left their legacies buried in their books? They considered humility, selflessness and sacrifice the crowning virtues of the Christian journey. They called the church to die to selfishness, greed and ambition. They knew what it means to carry a “burden” for lost souls. They saw the glories of the kingdom and demanded total surrender. They challenged God’s people to pursue obedience—even if obedience hurts.

Even their hymns reflected a level of consecration that is foreign in worship today. They sang often of the cross and its wonder. Their worship focused on the blood and its power. They sang words of heart-piercing conviction: “My richest gain I count but loss / And pour contempt on all my pride / Forbid it Lord that I should boast / Save in the death of Christ, My God.”

In so many churches today the cross is not mentioned. The blood is avoided because we don’t want to offend visitors. And worship is often a canned performance that involves plenty of rhythm and orchestration but little or no substance. We can produce noise, but often there is no heart … and certainly no tears.

In the books Christians buy today you will find little mention of brokenness. We are not interested in a life that might require suffering, patience, purging or the discipline of the Lord. We want our blessings … and we want them now! So we look for the Christian brand of spiritualized self-help that is quick and painless.

We’re running on empty. We think we are sophisticated, but like the Laodiceans we are actually poor, blind and naked. We need to return to our first love but we don’t know where to begin the journey.

These voices from the past will help point the way. I’ve found myself drawn to reading books by Ravenhill, Ten Boom, Murray and Spurgeon in recent days. I’ve even pulled out an old hymnal and rediscovered the richness of songs that I had thrown out years ago—because I thought anything old couldn’t possibly maintain a fresh anointing.

I realize now that I must dig for this buried treasure. We will never effectively reach our generation if we don’t reclaim the humility, the brokenness, the consecration and the travail that our spiritual forefathers considered normal Christianity.

Give Me a Heart of No Compromise

Posted in Uncategorized on July 21, 2009 by Bex

I’m feeling so broken tonight.

I feel like God is starting a higher level of heart surgery for me. There are some things in this process that I can’t bear, or think I can’t bear since God wouldn’t give me anything I can’t bear, He loves my heart more than I do. And there are some that’s causing a revolution of sorts in my heart, God redefining certain things, renewing my mind, reaffirming His call upon my life.

But one thing I know for sure about this is that God wants me to be free. Free of all lies and of all the restrictions and fear and everything else that the world has placed upon me. No longer will I let the world cripple me.

I will follow You.
To the unknown.
To the unsaved.
Give me a heart of no compromise.

God, I’m ready to reclaim my boldness. And all the things that the devil has stolen from me throughout the years – self-belief, hope, peace, faith, love. Help me to grow in Your wisdom and learn to walk as You lead.

***

One thing that I can’t understand, can’t imagine, can’t CONCEIVE of, is how Jesus carried all the sins of the world and held all our sorrows. By this I don’t mean that I don’t understand how it is possible for Jesus to have done this, I am not questioning whether or not He did it. I know that He did it. But I’m wondering how He could BEAR them all…how they didn’t completely break His heart [although I know He chose to be broken by them so that we would have freedom], how he held on to His will in spite of everything.

Coz I can’t do it. And mine is only a tiny speck compared to His, just a tiny little burden.

Be careful when you ask God to break your heart for what breaks His, be careful when you ask God to give you your nation. He’ll do it, and it can be quite unbearable, it can be quite painful, it can take away all your energy. But hold on, hold on to the hope that is in Him, for He has overcome. And He’s not making us carry these burdens ALONE, He’s already carried them, He’s still carrying them, He’s carrying them along with us.

We need You so badly in Malaysia, Lord. All over the world really. Lord, I want this generation of Malaysians to be a generation that knows You by name, that calls You by name, that loves You by name.

You are our only hope.

God, I ask that You give me my nation. Do not let me rest until it is in Your hands.

Philosophy makes my head spin

Posted in Uncategorized on July 20, 2009 by Bex

So I was reading C. S. Lewis’s Miracles: A Preliminary Study and I was going nowhere coz he took up a few chapters to define Naturalism and the laws of nature and how it contrasts with Supernaturalism and I was thinking, “OMGA what ever made me think I could DO Philosophy at all?” Everything I read literally just went over my head.

He is SUCH a genius though. Once I got to “A Chapter Not Strictly Necessary” I was just so amazed by the way he LOOKS at things, the way he argues them out, the way he draws out the absurdities contained in ideas that we’ve always believed in because it sounds “right” and now, even though I still think there is no need to complicate the discussion of miracles THAT much [but then again, for me there is no doubting the existence of miracles, or why God would perform them or that He is capable of performing them at all. But in the past few weeks, I've learnt that not everyone has the same privilege and understanding that I have, simply because they haven't been exposed to that side of God's nature, and they've been taught to believe that miracles no longer take place] I am enjoying it because he has gone on to argue about language and now I feel like I can follow it a little!!

I feel like typing EVERYTHING out, since all my cutting and pasting will mean that you’ll miss some of the clarifications that come in later but I shall just post snippets of it so you can go get the book and read it yourself!

“[God] is unspeakable not by being indefinite but by being too definite for the unavoidable vagueness of language. The words incorporeal and impersonal are misleading because they suggest that He lacks some reality which we possess. It would be safer to call Him trans-corporeal, trans-personal. Body and personality as we know them are the real negatives – they are what is left of positive being when it is sufficiently diluted to appear in temporal or finite forms. Even our sexuality should be regarded as the transposition into a minor key of that creative joy which in Him is unceasing and irresistible. Grammatically the things we say of Him are ‘metaphorical’: but in a deeper sense it is our physical and psychic energies that are mere ‘metaphors’ of real Life which is God. Divine Sonship is, so to speak, the solid of which biological sonship is merely a diagrammatic representation on the flat.

***

We have now three guiding principles before us: (1) That thought is distinct from the imagination which accompanies it.

(2) That thought may be in the main sound even when the false images that accompany it are mistaken by the thinker for the true ones.

(3) That anyone who talks about things which cannot be seen, or touched, or heard, or the like, must inevitably talk as if they could be seen or touched or heard (e.g. must talk of ‘complexes’ and ‘repressions’, as if desires could really be tied up in bundles or shoved back; of ‘growth’ and ‘development’ as if institutions could really grow like trees or unfold like flowers; of energy being ‘released’ as if it were an animal let out of a cage).

Let us now apply this to the ’savage’ or ‘primitive’ articles of the Christian creed. And let us admit at once that many Christians (though by no means all) when they make these assertions do have in mind just those crude mental pictures which so horrify the sceptic. When they say that Christ ‘came down from Heaven’ they do have a vague image of something shooting or floating downwards out of the sky. When they say that Christ is the ‘Son’ of ‘the Father’ they may have a picture of two human forms, the one looking rather older than the other. But we now know that the mere presence of these mental pictures does not, of itself, tell us anything about the reasonableness or absurdity of the thoughts they accompany. If absurd images meant absurd thought, then we should all be thinking nonsense all the time. And the Christians themselves make it clear that the images are not to be identified with the thing believed. They may picture the Father as a human form, but they also maintain that He has no body. They may picture Him older than the Son, but they also maintain the one did not exist before the other, both having existed from all eternity.

[...]

At this stage I must turn aside to deal with a rather simple-minded illusion. When we point out that what the Christians mean is not to be identified wit their mental pictures, some people say, ‘In that case, would it not be better to get rid of the mental pictures, and of the language which suggests them, altogether?’ But this is impossible. The people who recommend it have not noticed that when they try to get rid of man-like, or as they are called ‘anthropomorphic’, images they merely succeed in substituting images of some other kind. ‘I don’t believe in a personal God,’ says one, ‘but I do believe in a great spiritual force.’ What he has not noticed is that he word ‘force’ has let in all sorts of images about winds and tides and electricity and gravitation. ‘I don’t believe in a personal God,’ says another, ‘but I do believe we are all parts of one great Being which moves and works through us all’ – not noticing that he has merely exchanged the image of a fatherly and royal-looking man for the image of some widely extended gas or fluid. A girl I knew was bought up by ‘higher thinking’ parents to regard God as a perfect ’substance’; in later life she realised that this had actually led her to think of Him as something like a vast tapioca pudding. (To make matters worse, she disliked tapioca.) We may feel ourselves quite safe from this degree of absurdity, but we are mistaken. If a man watches his own mind, I believe he will find that what profess to be specially advanced or philosophic conceptions of God are, in his thinking, always accompanied by vague images which, if inspected, would turn out to be even more absurd than the man-like images aroused by Christian theology.

[...]

Even if it could be shown, then, that the early Christians accepted their imagery literally, this would not mean that we are justified in relegating their doctrines as a whole to the lumber-room. Whether they actually did, is another matter. The difficulty here is that they were not writing as philosophers to satisfy speculative curiosity about the nature of God and of the universe. They believed in God; and once a man does that, philosophical definiteness can never be the first necessity. A drowning man does not analyse the rope that is flung at him, nor an impassioned lover consider the chemistry of his mistress’s complexion. Hence the sort of question we are now considering is never raised by the New Testament writers. When once it is raised, Christianity decides quite clearly that the naif images are false. The sect in the Egyptian desert which thought that God was like a man is condemned: the desert monk who felt he had lost something by its correction is recognised as ‘muddle-headed’. All three Persons o the Trinity are declared ‘incomprehensible’. God is pronounced ‘inexpressible, unthinkable, invisible to all created beings’. The Second Person is not only bodiless but so unlike man that if self-revelation had been His sole purpose He would not have chosen to be incarnate in a human form. We do not find similar statements in the New Testament, because the issue has not yet been made explicit: but we do find statements which make it certain how that issue will be decided when once it becomes explicit. The title ‘Son’ may sound ‘primitive’ or ‘naif’. But already in the New Testament this ‘Son’ is identified with the Discourse or Reason or Word which was eternally ‘with God’ and yet also was God. He is the all-pervasive principle of concretion or cohesion whereby the universe holds together. All things, and specially Life, arose within Him, and within Him all things will reach their conclusion – the final statement of what they have been trying to express.

[...]

Mr Barfield has shown, as regards the history of language, that words did not start by referring merely to physical objects and then get extended by metaphor to refer to emotions, mental states and the like. On the contrary, what we now call the ‘literal and metaphorical’ meanings have both been disengaged by analysis from an ancient unity of meaning which was neither or both. In the same way it is quite erroneous to think that man started with a ‘material’ God or ‘Heaven’ and gradually spiritualised them. He could not have started with something ‘material’ for the ‘material’, as we understand it, comes to be realised only by contrast to the ‘immaterial’, and the two sides of the contrast grow at the same speed. He started with something which was neither and both. As long as we are trying to read back into that ancient unity either the one or the other or the two opposites which have since been analysed out of it, we shall misread all early literature and ignore many states of consciousness which we ourselves still from time to time experience. The point is crucial not only for the present discussion but for any sound literary criticism or philosophy.

The Christian doctrines, and even the Jewish doctrines which preceded them, have always been statements about spiritual reality, not specimens of primitive physical science. Whatever is positive in the conception of the spiritual has always been contained in them; it is only its negative aspect (immateriality) which has had to wait for recognition until abstract thought was fully developed. The material imagery has never been taken literally by anyone who had reached the stage when he could understand what ‘taking it literally’ meant. And now we come to the difference between ‘explaining’ and ‘explaining away’. It shows itself in two ways. (1) Some people when they say that a thing is meant ‘metaphorically’ conclude from this that it is hardly meant at all. They rightly think that Christ spoke metaphorically when he told us to carry the cross: they wrongly conclude that carrying the cross means nothing more than leading a respectable life and subscribing moderately to charities. They reasonably think that hell ‘fire’ is a metaphor – and unwisely conclude that it means nothing more serious than remorse. They say that the story of the Fall in Genesis is not literal; and then go on to say (I have heard them myself) that it was really a fall upwards – which is like saying that because ‘My heart is broken’ contains a metaphor, it therefore means ‘I feel very cheerful’. This mode of interpretation I regard, frankly, as nonsense. For me the Christian doctrines which are ‘metaphorical’ – or which have become metaphorical with the increase of abstract thought – means something which is just as ’supernatural’ or shocking after we have removed the ancient imagery as it was before. They mean that in addition to they physical or psycho-physical universe known to the sciences, there exists an uncreated and unconditioned reality which causes the universe to be; that this reality has a positive structure or constitution which is usefully, though doubtless not completely, described in the doctrine of the Trinity; and that this reality, at a definite point in time, entered the universe we know by becoming one of its own creatures and there produced effects on the historical level which the normal workings of the natural universe do not produce; and that this has brought about a change in our relationship to the unconditioned reality. It will be noticed that our colourless ‘entered the universe’ is not a whit less metaphorical than the more picturesque ‘came down from Heaven’. We have only substituted a picture of horizontal or unspecified movement for one of vertical movement. And every attempt to improve the ancient language will have the same result. These things not only cannot be asserted – they cannot even be presented for discussion – without metaphor. We can make our speech duller; we cannot make it more literal.

(2) These statements concern two things – the supernatural, unconditioned reality, and those events on the historical level which its irruption into the natural universe is held to have produced. The first thing is indescribable in ‘literal’ speech, and therefore we rightly interpret all that is said about it metaphorically. But the second thing is in a wholly different position. Events on the historical level are the sort of things we can talk about literally. If they occurred, they were perceived by the senses of men. Legitimate ‘explanation’ degenerates into muddled or dishonest ‘explaining away’ as soon as we start applying to these events the metaphorical interpretation which we rightly apply to the statements about God.”

Our God is a reasonable God

Posted in Uncategorized on July 17, 2009 by Bex

May I remind you of a point I made in an earlier chapter. Whitehead and Oppenheimer said modern science could not have been born except in the milieu of Christianity. Why? In the area of biblical Christianity Galileo, Copernicus, Kepler, Francis Bacon, up to Newton and Faraday, all these men understood that there was a universe there because God had made it. And they believed, as Whitehead has so beautifully said, that because God was a reasonable God you could discover the truth of the universe by reason. So modern science was born. The Greeks had almost all the facts that the early scientists had, but it never turned into science as modern science is. This came, as Whitehead said, out of the fact that these men really were sure that the universe could be pursued in reason because it had been made by a reasonable God, therefore we could expect to find out the truth of the world by reason. (71–72)

Science today is becoming a game; science is changing. As I have said, I do not believe for a moment that science, which has given up the thing which began it, and now has lost its positivism as well, can continue in a really objective way. Science becomes a game in two different ways. With many a scientist, science becomes a kind of gamesmanship. He is playing a complicated game within a very limited area so that he never has to think of the real problems or of meaning. There is many a scientist in his laboratory who has shut himself up to the reading on the dials, and the specimen all but disappears. This is no more than a different bourgeois gamesmanship to fill up the time, like a rich playboy skiing downhill, for thirty years perhaps, watching only the second-hand on his watch. But for the Christian the world has meaning; it has objective reality. Science is no longer a game. (81)

- Francis Schaeffer, He is There and He is not Silent

Posted in Uncategorized on July 15, 2009 by Bex

Sometimes I think we really flatter ourselves when we say, “I serve the most high God” or something like that. We think we have given God His due by piling on the superlatives that we have learnt by habit but do not yet KNOW by spirit nor by conviction nor by action nor by heart, but we really are not giving Him as much glory as He deserves. We make a big deal out of our weaknesses, and when God has achieved something for us, we also make a big deal out of that triumph and appropriate God’s glory for our own, but always being careful to state at the end of it all that it was “God who did it”. And before we know it, the devil gradually begins to fool us into believing that our show of humility is pleasing to God, and that we really are doing God a huge favour by SERVING Him. Guess what? We are not. It is God who is doing us a great service by rescuing us from our pathetic state as “nobodies” and transforming us into people with God-given worth. He dreams up dreams and places them in our hearts, every single one of us, and ALLOWS us to call them OUR vision, even though it never really is, it’s just a burden God places in our hearts, a purpose that He gifts to us so that we will have a reason to live, a reason to believe in ourselves, a reason to BE.

And He calls us His people – people who have the ability to exercise the authority that He has allowed us to use, people who have the ability to call upon the name of Jesus and be witness to metaphysical miracles that are BEYOND our understanding, people whose self-righteousness are like FILTHY RAGS to Him, rags that He then scrubs clean with the blood of the Lamb, hands it to us in a state that’s more perfect than new and declares us righteous. It is God who is, in some way, crazy as it sounds, serving us, humbling Himself so that we can participate in the great work that He has started and has promised He will finish. It is God is presenting us with a great privilege, not the other way round.

This is the God who created the heavens and the earth out of nothing, the God who feeds the lions and the lambs, the God whose voice causes the earth to tremble and the mountains to melt like wax. This is our God, there is nothing on earth that You can do for Him that will even be WORTHY to be considered an act of service unto Him, except He calls it so anyway. This is your God, so get rid of your self-importance and worship thou Him.

Be Thou Exalted

Posted in Uncategorized on July 9, 2009 by Bex

“O God be Thou exalted over my possessions. Nothing of earth’s treasures shall seem dear unto me if only Thou art glorified in my life. Be Thou exalted over my friendships. I am determined that Thou shalt be above all, though I must stand deserted and alone in the midst of the earth. Be Thou exalted above my comforts. Though it mean the loss of bodily comforts and the carrying of heavy crosses, I shall keep my vow made this day before Thee. Be Thou exalted over my reputation. Make me ambitious to please Thee even if as a result I must sink into obscurity and my name be forgotten as a dream. Rise, O Lord, into Thy proper place of honor, above my ambitions, above my likes and dislikes, above my family, my health and even my life itself. Let me sink that Thou mayest rise above. Ride forth upon me as Thou didst ride into Jerusalem mounted upon the humble little breast, a colt, the foal of an ass, and let me hear the children cry to Thee, “Hosanna in the highest.” Amen.”

Be Thou exalted above my circumstances, Lord. Let me fix my eye upon You and exchange my heavy burden for Your sweet yoke. I desire to view everything in my life through Your perspective, only I can’t do this by my own strength. I feel so tired and weak and useless and broken, and no one but You can restore me and make me feel whole again.

***

This is a sweet prayer, it puts into words the prayer of my heart:

“Lord, I would trust Thee completely; I would be altogether Thine; I would exalt Thee above all. I desire that I may feel no sense of possessing anything outside of Thee. I want constantly to be aware of Thy overshadowing presence and to hear Thy speaking voice. I long to live in restful sincerity of heart. I want to live so fully in the Spirit that all my thoughts may be as sweet incense ascending to Thee and every act of my life may be an act of worship. Therefore I pray in the words of Thy great servant of old, “I beseech Thee so for to cleanse the intent of my heart with the unspeakable gift of Thy grace, that I may perfectly love Thee and worthily praise Thee”. And all this I confidently believe Thou wilt grant me through the merits of Jesus Christ Thy Son. Amen.”

- Tozer

I want to delve into the works of the ancient saints. The words that they wrote to God and for God are so beautiful and pure and filled with passion that reading them makes my heart burst. I feel like I can learn so much from them.

I was thinking again about some of the ancient literature [i.e. Chaucer] and I thought how perfectly beautiful and amazing and admirable it is that even in the midst of their frivolous love stories/songs/lyrics, they never forget to devote some space to the exaltation of God. They never forget to put their love for God even above their love for their lovers.

And even though I still don’t understand much of it, I am beginning to think that Song of Songs is a magnificent book. I want to have God ravish my heart and love Him as perfectly as I can. And I really do hope that I’ll learn to love God more through the poetry class I’ll be taking next semester. :)

What a gorgeous prayer

Posted in Uncategorized on July 7, 2009 by Bex

“Father, I want to know Thee, but my cowardly heart fears to give up its toys. I cannot part with them without inward bleeding, and I do not try to hide without inward bleeding, and I do not try to hide from Thee the terror of the parting. I come trembling but I do come. Please root from my heart all those things which I have cherished so long and which have become a very part of my living self, so that Thou mayest enter and dwell there without a rival. Then shalt Thou make the place of Thy feet glorious. Then shall my heart have no need of the sun to shine in it, for Thyself wilt be the light of it, and there shall be no night there. In Jesus’ name. Amen.”

- Tozer